Random Thought on Raising the Minimum Wage

The other day I overheard some people discussing Seattle’s $15/hr minimum wage. Their conversation centered around if it would hurt or help the economy, the effect it would have on small business, etcetera. Basically the same bullet points everyone else is mulling over. As I was listening to the conversation it occurred to me that there is a consequence to raising the minimum wage that no one is considering.

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I Get Carsick

Over the past couple of years I’ve come to realize that I get car sick. It’s particularly potent if I read or stare off anywhere but directly ahead for too long. It’s not bad, or at least I’ve never let it get bad, I just get a bit woozy. Before now I either didn’t get car sick or simply didn’t notice that I did. I chalk its development up to aging and shitty genetics.

There is a small part of me that is annoyed about this because I perceive it as a weakness. I worry that other people perceive it as a weakness. But what really bothers me about getting car sick, I mean what makes me loathe and despise and hate that I get carsick, is that my mom gets car sick.

You see, my mom is a loathsome person. The only reason I still call her “mom” is because of convention somewhat dictates I do, and because saying “the one who gave birth to me” is too cumbersome. Whatever credit, respect, or adulation that she earned by birthing me, has long since been used up. I grew up learning to be ashamed of my mom, and in turn learning, albeit irrationally, to be ashamed of myself.

I can deal with getting carsick, it’s manageable, tolerable even. What’s intolerable and infuriating, is that the reason I get carsick is because I share DNA with that loathsome person. As if it weren’t enough to know and have to live with the shame, guilt, and humiliation.

Do you know how many Jelly Belly Beans I could buy?

From: Jim
Date: Wed, Jul 21, 2010
To:
Subject: HUGE Japanese Maple (about 10 foot wide) – $50

Since, when dug up, it may well die I’m not willing to pay anything. However, if you have no takers and simply want it gone I’d be willing to do the work and remove it on Saturday.


From: Me
Date: Wed, Jul 21, 2010
To: Jim
Subject: Re: HUGE Japanese Maple (about 10 foot wide) – $50

It’s so nice of you to offer to take something for free that we are *selling* for a not quite insignificant amount of cash money. Give yourself a pat on the back! While your waiting to to see if we have any “takers” might I suggest that you browse the freeloader section of Craigslist.

thankyouverymuch,

Me


From: Jim
Date: Wed, Jul 21, 2010
To: Me
Subject: Re: HUGE Japanese Maple (about 10 foot wide) – $50

Not a problem… actually ‘Buy’ a lot of things from craigslist and also sell and give away a lot … truly thought I might be doing you a favor. Sorry you took offense… it was not meant that way.I hope you have a blessed day anyway.


From: Me
Date: Wed, Jul 21, 2010
To: Jim
Subject: Re: HUGE Japanese Maple (about 10 foot wide) – $50

No, offense taken. But… If I wanted to give my plant away for free I’d probably of posted it in the free section. In your first reply you tell me point-blank “I’m not willing to pay anything…” It strikes me as a bit audacious because clearly my intention is to sell my plant, not give it away.

Would you walk into a super market and tell the checker “I’m not willing to pay anything for this loaf of bread… but I will save you the trouble of having it in your store by taking it home with me”?

Maybe it was your choice of words that rubbed me wrong: “I’m not willing to pay anything…” gives me the impression that you feel entitled to get my plant for free. There are a number of people I would gladly give my plant to for free. Since I don’t know you, I think it’s safe to assume that you are not one of those people.

In any case, I am *practically* giving my plant away for free. Considering the asking price for one of comparable size on Craigslist is $3000 (and the buyer has to dig it out). Do you have any idea how many Jelly Belly Beans I could buy with $3000? Nether did I, so I looked it up on Amazon. I could get 440lbs of Jelly Belly Beans with $3000, I’d even get free shipping. Could you imagine 440lbs of Jelly Belly Beans? Gosh, if only life were that good.

There is one thing that does offend me though. In your last reply you used the font Comic Sans. Comic Sans offends me. You’re writing an e-mail, not a comic. I don’t think your 5 either. Maybe it’s time to pick a font that’s more appropriate for the medium and your age.

Peace,

Me


From: Jim
Date: Wed, Jul 21, 2010
To: Me
Subject: Re: HUGE Japanese Maple (about 10 foot wide) – $50

You are entitled to your opinion… and I do pray the rest of your day is blessed and you are not bothered again by people like me


Image Credit: YXG via Flicker

To Jeffery

UPDATE 11/16/2010: Amway agrees to pay $56 million, settle case alleging it operates a ‘pyramid scheme’

Dear Jeff,

If you’re reading this then you have received your CD I sent back to you with a link to this post. I’d first like to start this letter with a couple of quotes from Wikipedia:

A pyramid scheme is a non-sustainable business model that involves the exchange of money primarily for enrolling other people into the scheme, often without any product or service being delivered.

Pyramid schemes are illegal in many countries, including the United States…

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